Why A Camel Is The Pet Of The 21st Century

Written three and a half thousand years ago
On a Tuesday

Not that it matters, but I was eating coconut ice cream with sticky rice when I wrote this


I have a pet camel.
His name is Humps.
If you live in drought-weary California, a camel is the pet you need.
Humps can drink 20 gallons of water at one time.
He can water your lawn, irrigate your garden and fill your swimming pool all at the same time.
And who wouldn’t love a pet who insists on taking naps with you?

Humps has two sets of extremely long eyelashes, bushy eyebrows and nostrils that close at will.
So the next time you’re on the red carpet and smell something you don’t like…be like Humps…
close your nostrils,
drink some water,
and take a nap.

Always there for you,
Except for right now,
Because I need coffee.
Peace out,

Dr. Beasley